Surviving the World's Biggest Water Fight, an American Cult in Cambodia, and My First Few Days in VIetnam.

I’m not going to lie—after more than two weeks of solitude and introspection, it was really nice to be social and let loose a little.  Although while playing the “sensible” adult, in my last entry, lambasting Khosan Road’s interpretation of Songkran, it was really a lot of fun.  Picture several thousand people crammed into a crazy network of nonsensical streets in an area about the size of a football stadium.  All participating in a giant water fight. It was chaos. It was refreshing. It was lovely.

Never in my life have I been able to shoot total strangers in the face with ice cold water with total impunity. Of course, I got as good as I gave, from water guns, buckets and other assorted apparatti, but that was part of the fun.  It was the most pure enjoyment, chemically induced or otherwise, that I have had in years. For a few hours, I felt like a kid again. And I never would have done it on my own. So, thanks to Heejay for enjoying the festivities with me. 

After my trip to Thailand in 2011, I never intended to return to Bangkok, much less Khosan road, but I’m actually glad I did...although after four days, I was excited to get out of Bangkok, and indeed, Thailand.  I actually didn’t know that Siem Reap had an airport three weeks ago. But indeed it does, and after a short flight of about an hour, I was there.  Like Bangkok, I never intended to return to Siem Reap, but all in all I had a good time there too. 

It was dark when I arrived and it took a little while to get my visa after landing. The tuk-tuk driver taking me into town thought I wouldn’t be able to get a room because of the New Year’s celebrations—to which I replied that I was going to have to. I don’t think he understood. 

The driver let me off on Watbo Road, where the cheap hotels lined both sides. After checking a dozen hotels or so, I settled on a room with two double beds, which, I would have to vacate by six-forty in the morning—for fifteen US dollars. Ouch!

The early check out time was fine, as I would have to be at the pick-up spot at seven-forty-five, but the goddamn receptionist ended up giving me why wake-up “call” (he actually had to knock on the door as there was no phone) at five-forty-five. Not having a watch, I didn’t notice the time until I had returned the key.

No matter—I was able to find the meeting place in short order, and before I knew it I was loaded into a tuk-tuk, along with some twenty others, on my way to Hariharalaya—a yoga and meditation retreat  near a farming village, just outside of Siem Reap.

I would like to say that I was surprised that ninety-per cent of those attending the retreat were women, and that of those seventy-five per cent were in their early twenties...but I really wasn’t. I had hoped that I would be among a group of serious-minded practitioners, driven by the common goal of cutting through delusion to get a taste of sweet, sweet sit-chat-ananda, but alas, it was not to be. 

On the plus side, the entire retreat center (compound?) was very nice.  All of the buildings were made out of wood and bamboo, with grass roofs. The beds were super comfortable, there were a games room, cinema, and reading room, and even a small pool in addition to the core buildings. 

We were free to wander around in bare feet as the paths from one building to another were made of soft sand. Such wanderings were shaded by banana, mango and coconut trees. The fruits of which were included in our delicious vegan meals.

Hariharalaya was a nice resort to relax, and get healthy. It’s perfect if you want to detox and learn the fundamentals of hatha yoga and samatha meditation.  I’m happy I had the experience for the health benefits.  But as I said, it’s not the sort of place for more serious seekers. 

Resident wise-guy and founder of the retreat center, Joel, had been walking the spiritual path for some time, though, and indeed appeared to have some significant insight. Unfortunately, the first (and last) dharma talk of his I attended was dreadfully bad.

Despite the lack of profound spiritual insight that I hoped to gained, it was a nice experience...except for getting sick on the third day. I think it was from the ice I put in my drinking water.

In the end, I’m not sure it was worth the money it I spent on the retreat plus the extra flight and visa for Cambodia, since the USD is so much stronger than the CAD at the moment. But if I had to get sick anywhere, I suppose I was lucky I got sick there! 

Now I’m in Vietnam, where it’s a little cooler, a little rainier and a little cheaper. Food is really cheap (usually three to five dollars per meal), and beer is even cheaper at less than a dollar for a bottle of the local draught. 

I’ve met up with my old pal Simon, from my Malaysian adventure, and his friend Oevind. We picked up motorcycles in Hoh Chi Minh city and along with a couple Aussies, we’ve begun the long journey to Hanoi. I’m still coughing up phlegm, but am more or less in normal health.

At the moment, I’m sitting in a hammock in Cat Tien national park getting eaten alive by mosquitos. Screw Africa, send the Malaria vaccine here! 

We head out early tomorrow, so I’m afraid this is where my story ends for today.  These little reports of mine may continue to be farther in between for a while, but don’t worry! I’ll keep writing as long as I’m on the road, and I’ll try to take some more pretty pictures for you all while I’m at it.

Until next time, where I’ll be coming at you from...

Somehow I've Materialized on Khosan Road

I’ve appeared on Khosan Road again. I say “appeared”, because I always felt like my experience here in 2011 was quite sufficient.  This is my second day, and I’m still trying to figure out how my presence here came to pass. This is probably the worst place for me right now. Like, in the world.

Khosan Road, for the uninitiated, is Bangkok’s, and indeed South East Asia’s backpacker’s primary hub. Although it seems to have cleaned up a little bit since my last visit, it’s like that drug abusing friend from high-school that insists that no really, this time he’s cleaned up his act. You just know that despite your old amigo’s best intentions, under the surface something dark lies is wait, just waiting for the right moment to expose itself.

As far as I know (and really, I don’t know much about Asia’s “city of angels”) Khosan road is the most obnoxious place in Bangkok outside of Pat Thong (the red light district): of course, there is the excessive drinking—when you mix hundreds of mostly young travellers and restaurant beers at less than $2 per bottle—you’re asking for it. I’m sure people are on all sorts of other things too. So naturally, by midnight, there are throngs of people bumbling around acting generally moronic...and will continue to do so unti the wee hours. But despite these naught ex-pats, it’s the hawkers and tuk-tuk drivers who are the really obnoxious ones.

You’re lucky if, walking down Kohsan Road, or any of the neighbouring streets, more than ten seconds pass without some annoying fuckass asking you where you’re going,  trying to shake your hand, asking you where you’re from, or merely saying “hey”, and pointing to whatever shit they are trying to sell you. All farang on Khosan road, are in the eyes of the Thai, walking ATMs. 

Until today, I often had the thought,

“My how Thailand has changed—the locals aren’t nearly as pushy as I remember them!” 

Khosan Road is obviously the exception. 

Additionally, I’m sick and fucking tired of seeing all of the stunning  young women from the four corners o
f the globe, everywhere I look...sauntering around with their handsome young boyfriends. Sick of it! And I thought Koh Phangan was bad. Fuck you, Khosan Road! 

And there’s more to the anguish. In two days it will be Songkran: Thai New Year’s Day, which probably has a long tradition of getting together with the family, doing elaborate rituals, religious stuff and whatever, but here on Khosan  Road, people spend the whole day dumping buckets of ice water on each other’s heads, you’re brand new i-phone be damned.  

So, really, why am I here? Mainly two things: I’m going to Cambodia, and it’s cheapest to fly out of Bangkok; and it just so happens an co-worker from Korea is going to be in town for Songran.  To top it all off, the time period for which I had agreed to rent the house in Koh Phangan was up, so I figured, why not go to Bangkok?   

Why indeed? After a day, I think I’ve had about my fill. And yet here I must remain until I fly out on Tuesday evening.

Which brings me to Cambodia.  As much as I am loath to repeat another country, I am returning to Cambodia, where I vacationed after finishing my second contract in Korea at the end of 2012. I’ll be playing the hippy and doing a five day yoga and meditation retreat in a Cambodian farming village called Hariharaliya, or something. 

Which at USD $285 for five days, on top of the plane ticket and visa fees, will account for a half a month’s budget.  After the retreat is finished, I’ll be flying into Saigon and buying a motorcycle, accounting for the other half. 

Oh well, Vietnam, I understand, is even cheaper than Thailand...and after five days of yoga and meditation followed by a couple weeks cruising along the coast of Vietnam should put me in very good spirits indeed.  Finally, finally, I’ll be away from the party culture.  Then, finally, I can set my mind to introspection, in earnest.

If you don’t hear from me by Tuesday night,  dear family and friends, I’ll be internet-less in buttfuck nowhere, Cambodia, eating bean sprouts and chanting om, so don’t be alarmed. Or do. Maybe you have that right...

Double-Sized Mega Post: What Am I STILL doing in Koh Phangan?

What AM I still doing in Koh Phangan? I've been here since March 24th, so that's...eleven days! I've rented this little house I'm in now until the ninth, so I guess I'll be here five days more. So...am I getting bored? Am I getting cabin fever? Am I getting stinking drunk? Read on and find out.

When I first envisioned this trip, I was to start on the other side of Eurasia. The idea was to practice my shamefully bad language skills along the way. I can speak a little French, less Arabic, and even less Korean. The idea was to work my way across North Africa, practicing French and Arabic where I could, and then go along the north side of the Mediterranean, getting more French practice, and making my way to St. Petersburg, where I would take the Trans Siberian Railway to China, where I would try to learn Chinese by immersing myself in it for three months...because, well, it's more useful than Korean.


So, I've decided that even though I'm in Thailand, I might as well give it a go anyway, so I picked up a copy of Herman Hesse's Siddhartha at one of the local second-hand book stores. This actually has special significance to me since, since I read the book in English many years ago, and it ignited in me a passion for Buddhism, which is at the heart of why I'm doing this trip. Also, although it didn't occur to me in the bookstore, the last time I was in Thailand, four years ago, I read Steppenwolf (also by Hesse).

I'm making my way through Siddhartha in French pretty well. I can understand about eighty per cent of it, which I find really surprising. I've been getting to practice my spoken French too. The cool thing about where I'm staying is that it's full of French speakers. The person  who secured the place for me is a French Canadian, and my neighbors are from France. I was even invited to a neighborhood party full of French speakers. It was good fun. I got drunk and stoned with a bunch of older French people!



That kind of behavior though, was  more or less a one off. I actually haven't been drinking, or smoking a lot...although this is definitely the island to do it, for those inclined. Especially on the south coast, of the island, where ninety per cent of the traffic seems to be. More on that in a minute.

Aside from the occasional hiccup, I've been walking the straight and narrow path. I've been settling into my little home here, and keeping mostly to myself. I've established a pretty good routine, actually. Most days, I wake up early, anywhere from six to nine, and go for a jog. Then, in no particular order, I do yoga, meditate, go for a swim in the ocean, read, and make something to eat. That usually brings me to about noon, at which point I jump on my scooter, and rip around the island, mucking around until late. Then I go home, and read for a while, or make something to eat.




I may be getting a little too settled in here. The local animals are getting friendly. There are of course, dogs and cats, but there are some more interesting animals as well. A pair of strange, and hilariously noisy birds are to be seen (and heard) every morning. Sometimes, one of the them breaks into my kitchen looking for something to eat. He's gone in a flash when I come into the kitchen, but I throw a bit of cereal out the window, and they are happy to eat it. Also, Although they were at first very shy I now realize my house is crawling with gekos. I love them, because they eat mosquitoes. There are even a cow and a young bull kicking around. 

I get stir crazy fairly easily though, so at midday, instead of communing with various animals all afternoon, I've been exploring the island.Despite this, I think I went an entire week on Koh Phangan without seeing Haad Rin, which is the best beach on the island, and home to the monthly full moon party. I think it might be a record. Most people that come the Koh Phangan are only here for a couple of days for the big event, so for them, it's off the ferry and to the Haad Rin area for libation and debauchery.

I seriously considered not even going to the full moon party, as it's sort of anathema to my purposes here. But, I thought, why not at least take a look around and snap a couple of photos. Well, I got out of there at about eight thirty, just about the time people started dancing to techno, chugging down buckets of alcohol, and playing with fire and kerosene. Basically, the party was just getting started, and would continue for another eight hours or so.



Frankly, I was frightfully bored. But so it goes, when you're in your early thirties and traveling solo for purposes of self-discovery. Honestly, I don't know what I'm still doing in Koh Phangan.

No, that's not true. It's a beautiful island, with excellent food, and some really great beaches and a good climate. Best of all, it's got  some great roads with lots of good corners and plenty of ups and downs. More than anything, I've been enjoying ripping around on the scooter I've been renting. I suppose Koh Phangan as good as any place to get grounded and contemplate my futher travel plans, party people not withstanding.

Speaking of my travel plans, it looks like I'll be meeting an old colleague from my days teaching English in Tongyeong. The plan is to meet in Bangkok for Songkran (Thai new year). From there, I plan to do a yoga retreat in Cambodia and then possibly meet two other former colleagues from Tongyeong in China. Vietnam and Burma will have to wait, I guess. 

Tune in next time, where I'll be coming to you live from...